19 February 2010

How much do I hate technology...let me count the ways

My phone sits in front of me. I do nothing with it. Then the red light starts flashing. I've missed a phone call. How does this happen? The phone is just sitting there. It didn't ring. I pick it up and the dial meaning it's busy starts to spin. I click the red button to stop it and it keeps on spinning. What is it busy doing? I am the human. Why should I have to wait for the technology. It should be waiting for me. I put the digital copy of The Dark Knight into my laptop. The jacket of the dvd says "Insert disk. Enter authorization code. Follow directions." I do this. It takes me somewhere else because I need to download something to assist the first download. I do all of this and then the program just stalls and ceases. I have no idea what it's doing and I wait and then I wait and I get nothing. I try to download it again and it tells me I have already downloaded it although it is not there. I search the piece-of-crap Windows Vista search and it cannot find it. In fact, it cannot find anything called "dvd". I go to Microsoft Help and the site instructs me to download Updates. That is the only advice it gives me. I try to do this but it tells me, since I have Windows Vista, these updates are not applicable. If I was as rich as Elvis I'd go through as many smartphones and laptops as I would 12 gauge shells because I would be blowing that shit away. Ah, this show ain't no good!

Why I get writer's block

Writing can be so frustrating for me. Today is the second day I have worked on a blog entry titled "Your First History Lesson". I have written the first half twice so far and it is still not near being completed. I tend to edit as I write and the damn thing just gets longer and longer until I don't know which end of it is up. So instead of a piece about the history of the U.S. I am going to talk about Tiger Woods mixing martinis and vicodin. Tiger didn't mix the martinis and vicodin, I did. And I don't care what you think about it. Like my friend D.J. texted me this morning, "I wish Tiger would have come out and said "Oh,what do you think of me? F U! Any questions? I didn't think so." He doesn't owe me an apology any more than the guy across the street who cheated on his wife. It's not my business. I'm not married but if I was, even if it was to the girl of my dreams, and she does exist (hi!) I don't know how many times I could resist a gorgeous twenty-two year old throwing herself at me. And if she was going to bring her friend along? Forget about it! It's like math: two tens wouldn't add up to twenty, they would be squared and you'd get a hundred. In fact, maybe they oould help me get over my writer's block.

Now I got it...

I figured out how to change my blog title: Good For Me!! The new title is stolen from Abbie Hoffman's Steal This Book. I know it's weak. Like I've said before my imagination is limited. I was born in the 1960's, I grew up in the 1970's free and running around barefoot, and spent the 1980's running barefoot and free through my own life. The resurgence of the 1960's during this time led me to read On The Road and lots of Hunter Thompson. I understand where the 60's social movement was coming from but I never believed in the communal living and constant sharing of the hippies. I think they liked to share your stuff more than their own. Anyway, I liked the Fight the Power politics of the time. I also liked the newer stuff on the scene in the 80's like Public Enemy and Ice-T, stuff that questioned and challenged the Establishment: "Freedom of speech, that's the motherfuckin' bullshit. You say the wrong thing, they'll lock your ass up quick." I think Thomas Jefferson would have agreed. Fight the Power!